She died calmly; and her countenance expressed affection even in
death. I need not describe the feelings of those whose dearest
ties are rent by that most irreparable evil, the void that
presents itself to the soul, and the despair that is exhibited
on the countenance. It is so long before the mind can persuade
itself that she, whom we saw every day, and whose very existence
appeared a part of our own, can have departed for ever -- that the
brightness of a beloved eye can have been extinguished, and the
sound of a voice so familiar, and dear to the ear, can be
hushed, never more to be heard. These are the reflections of the
first days; but when the lapse of time proves the reality of the
evil, then the actual bitterness of grief commences. Yet from
whom has not that rude hand rent away some dear connexion; and
why should I describe a sorrow which all have felt, and must
feel? The time at length arrives, when grief is rather an
indulgence than a necessity; and the smile that plays upon the
lips, although it may be deemed a sacrilege, is not banished. My
mother was dead, but we had still duties which we ought to
perform; we must continue our course with the rest, and learn to
think ourselves fortunate, whilst one remains whom the spoiler
has not seized.
My journey to Ingolstadt, which had been deferred by these
events, was now again determined upon. I obtained from my father
a respite of some weeks. This period was spent sadly; my
mother's death, and my speedy departure, depressed our spirits;
but Elizabeth endeavoured to renew the spirit of cheerfulness in
our little society. Since the death of her aunt, her mind had
acquired new firmness and vigour. She determined to fulfil her
duties with the greatest exactness; and she felt that that most
imperious duty, of rendering her uncle and cousins happy, had
devolved upon her. She consoled me, amused her uncle,
instructed my brothers; and I never beheld her so enchanting as
at this time, when she was continually endeavouring to
contribute to the happiness of others, entirely forgetful of
herself.